Tonight is the Night! A Boyce Xmas Santa Tale
Kids hiding from the Sick Santa
Merry Christmas all!
Its Christmas Eve, tonight is the night that Santa Claus is suppose to come to your home bearing gifts.
I don’t know about you but I can’t tell you that thought brings me any level of comfort.
In this day and age the thought of an old man creeping into my kids room at night talking bout he come to bring gifts gives me some cause for concern, and it should do the same for you.
When you really look at it the reputation of Santa Claus leaves a lot to be desired, remember the song “I saw mummy kissing Santa Claus”?
In it Santa crept into some guy’s house and kiss a man wife (aka horn) right in front of his son, Santa is sick then!
Red Plastic Bag our Barbados calypso king also had a similar experience, he caught his woman getting it on with the wuckless Santa, she had the audacity to ask Bag “what is wrong if he hug and kiss it was Santa Claus”
And I need not remind of that vicious act of violence when Santa run over Grandma with his Reindeer, and didn’t stop. There is still an arrest warrant out for him on that one.
Has Santa brought any gifts for you recently? Why is it he only sneaks into little kid’s rooms to take gifts to them only? Sounds like the actions of a pedophile to me,
Also of concern is the line of thought that this Santa guy is actually a pagan creation to distract people from the true meaning of Christmas which is to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.
Some of you on there didn’t know that right?
That is because you have been brainwashed by the evil mummy kissing Santa Claus, a being whose first name “Santa” rearranged spells “Satan”.
We need to take advice from our bajan Original Ducks Xmas song “beat he or wuh”
Tonight is the night, we should wait with a cricket bat for that Santa to creep in and lick him to ass up, then call the police!
If I dispelled your image of Santa Claus with the above tale, GOOD! You need to look towards the Lord!
We would like to take this opportunity at Boyce Voice to wish you Merry Christmas All!
PS This post will make Darron cry,he is a Santa Claus lover
If during the reading of this blog there is any thing I might have written which might have incensed or offended you, GET OVER IT! There are many things I read and hear in the media on a daily basis that I don't like either. SO DEAL WITH IT! You are welcome to leave your comments though. Make sure and come back yuh hear !!!...
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December 24th, 2007 at 8:41 pm
Tonight Is The Night
This Christmas Eve Boyce says get out the bat
Organize yahself like yah under attack
Nod but don’t sleep, put sleep on a pause
Invasion’s tonight by this Santa Claus
Going from house to house hoping the men
Having strong sleeps while the women are working
This Satan disguised with beard lily white
Is secretly stealing kisses from women tonight
So bamboozle by his slickness and charming spell
These women are willing to walk straight into hell
How he does it so swiftly is a mystery
Even the US can’t track him with their technology
Nic is slick, he’s the greatest of thieves
In effect stealing gifts, now God grieves
Gifts Jesus brought of peace, goodwill and cheer
High jacked by thieving Santa this time each year
Tonight we can stop it, stop Santa in his tracks
Lets give back Christmas to Jesus, get out yah cricket bats
Merry Christmas Friends
Have a Happy New Year
December 29th, 2007 at 2:50 pm
Twas de night before Christmas, when all tru de house, All de
fellers was tinkin ’bout puddin an’ souse.
De hams were all hung by de sideboard wid care, In hopes
that tomorrow, there’d be nuff sweet food to share.
De chil’ren were ball-up all tight in their beds, While
visions of pumpkin fritters danced ’bout in their heads.
You cud smell de sweet bread in de oven from far, And I had
just crack a fresh bottle of Cockspur 5 Star.
When out in de chicken coop there arose such a clatter.
I jump up from my ottaman to see wha de ram-bam was de matter.
Away to the window I flew like a zr van, Equip wid 2 big
salt breads, holdin in my hand.
The moon on de dunks tree looked so lovely an’ bright, But it
suddenly occurred to me that I was tired as shite.
When, what with my malicious eyes do I see?
Wuh loss! A big mustysanta pee, right by my feet!
Bring de cutlass goah-blemmuh! Dis ting gine bite me!
And de nex ting I look, it was up by my knee.
More rapid than Winston Hall dis ting start to climb, If I
had some Baygon, I knew I’d be fine.
The brow of my forehead was starting to sweat, But wait! I
hadda idea…I wasn’t done for yet.
So I grabble piece a board and give it a chop, Wax! Puhlax!
Bruggadung! Brax! I would not stop.
You shudda see de ting denn, it tek so much licks…
It was now all over the floor, like corn beef on Crix.
But Beryl was ‘busing as bad as could be, ‘Bout how I dirty
up de floor wid dead santa-pee.
Ah tell she doan worry and ah tell she don fret, But that
foolish old gal like she ain hear ma yet.
She keep making bare noise and giving backchat, So I chop she
wid a salt bread, and dat was de end ah dat.
December 31st, 2007 at 9:37 am
hmmn !