Read in the weekend paper of Barbadian sexual entrepreneur Charles Lewis talking about the amount of money you can make in the sex trade.
The figures caught my interest; I was thinking I was in the wrong entertainment business.
Charles boasted how a sex worker can make $500 per hour, let’s do the sexual math.
Put that into a working day, that’s $4000. Let’s say you only work 5 days (or nights) you still go to church on Sunday and spend a day with the family you still generate $20,000 in one week.
In a month that’s $80,000 you could make, let me repeat in words so you get it, eighty thousand dollars Barbados Dollarsin one month. Since I am not doing the Madd thing any more I could see that working for me..
Lewis stated that he had been in the sex trade for 25 years and it had been so lucrative that it had been hard for him to leave it, I don’t blame him for 25 years I have been telling jokes talking bout I is a comedian, the joke was on me, whoring is where the money is. No wonder it is known as the “oldest profession” and has been around for thousands of years

Charles spoke about his efforts to have the sex industry recognized as a legitimate profession; soon they’ll be no shame in aspiring to be a prostitute. You should soon be able to have evening classes in whoring-ism to make you good at it. (I would probably have to take one of those refresher courses)
Why bury your head in the sand and pretend sex tourism does not exist when you could be involved and be burying your head other places, finding other revenue generation activities you can do with your “head”.
For $80,000 per month I would take a stab at it at this whore thing, wouldn’t you? or I could get a couple of girls together and become  a sexual entrepreneur like Charles and join the Barbados Chamber of Commerce and thing.

Using Eddie Murphy’s 80’s sketch as inspiration a sex worker ad would probably read like this….

How would you like to make thousands of dollars with out leaving the comfort of your bedroom?

How would you like to meet new people and make new friends every night…?

This is your chance to make thousands of dollars for doing something you LIKE….

Why do it for free when you could do it and get paid for it?

Your chance to be somebody…

Be a Whore!…..

Sign up now at www.beawhore.com

Now if your girl friend catches you in the act you can now exclaim “what’s with you girl? can’t you see I am working!!”

 or “She meant nothing to me it was just work”…

I could just go on like this all day, I need to stop ….

The B in Batman does not stand for bakes…

I learnt that the hard way when I went in de theatre this week, or for international readers I went to the cinema, here in Barbados we call going to the cinema going in de theater (or theatha).   
But I digress, back to my point.
I went to the Olympus cinema concession snack bar before and decided to take a chance and order my favorite bajan snack,
So I gave my order to the cute female attendant  “I would like to have a large pop corn a small coke and ……ahm  3 bakes!…” 

“3 wha?” the attendant exclaimed looking at me like I was the joker in the Batman movie I was going to see. 

“Bakes” I responded “B.A.K.E.S bakes” I spelt it out for her so it would be crystal clear what I desired.

“I am sorry sir we don’t sell bakes here, do you want a hot dog or some Nachos?”.

I don’t even know what the ass is a nacho, I did feel like cursing she and introducing her to a Bajan word that starts with “R”, but I controlled my self.

“I don’t want no stinking nachos” I retorted “ I want bakes!
by this time my sons who I had taken to the cinema had move away not wanting to be associated with my vociferous bake behaviour.
I contemplated asking to see the manager but by this time I could see security beginning assemble around me, I did not get the impression they were there for to assist me in my ordering.

 So I had a decision to make…
The question I asked my self was, should I stand up for my bake principles risked being unceremoniously thrown out the cinema not seeing Batman, being disowned by my sons rebuked by my Christian wife or should I eat the stinking Americanized snack like a wimp….?    

Well I gotta tell yuh, the hot dog went down pretty good, and the coca cola too. 
I put extra bajan pepper sauce on it to Barbadianise it…

That’s how I discovered the B in Batman does not stand for bakes!

Boyce Gripe;I think we have a serious cultural problem when you go to the concession at the movies and can’t get a Bajan snack.
Yuh cant get a glass of mauby just bare fizzy drinks mashing up yuh stomach and giving yuh ulcers.
You can’t get a cheese cutter, years ago I remember buying cheese cutters in the Bridgetown Olympic cinema, dem days done!
They now even now selling Chinese food in the Olympus like we in BEJING, but yuh can’t get a bake.
That’s why so much of we Bajans talking like Americans because of all the American food we eating.
It is because of all the American and Chinese food they keep forcing on us that are making us lose our cultural identity and run slow and got the West Indies can’t win at Cricket. This is a matter that needs to be addressed with utmost bake-ency!

Ayana John Winner of $5000 Got Rhythm Competition 

The GotRhythm.com eSoca Competition 2008 came to an end at mid-night August 8th. Congratulations to Ayana John for winning the inaugural competition with Kimberley Inniss in 2nd place and newcomers Rhea & JayCee in third. The order is as follow:

             Song                                          Artist      Prize
1.          Just The Way                          Ayana John         $5000
2.          Merry Go Round feat. Alicia    Kimberley Inniss     $2500
3.          Handle It feat JayCee             Rhea          $1250
4.          Nah Missin Meh                       Edwin Yearwood       
5.          Wrong Gal                                RPB
6.          Show Me                                   Kirk Brown       
7.          Dat Is What I Talkin’ Bout       Andy Armstrong (Blood)       
8.          In a Party Mood                        Hypa Soundz       
9.          Big Girls                                   Biggie Irie       
10.        Baby Oh Baby                          Adrian Clarke       

The producer of the winning song is Darron Grant and he will receive $1000.The customer who purchased the most downloads is Jackie Clarke with 428 downloads and she will receive a Video Camcorder. This competition attracted customers from Trinidad & Tobago, United Kingdom, United States, Canada and Japan. Special mention must be made of Ikeda Kiyotaka (Kanagawa Japan) who purchased 80 downloads and was leading the customer download competition for over one month and was only passed during the last few days of competition.

The awards will be presented at The VIP Party, which will be held at Café Jungles in The Gap on August 30th. There will be performances by several Top 10 artists. Additionally all eSoca customers are eligible to enter the customer draw for a Blackberry Smartphone, Digital Camera and an MP3 player, which will be held at the VIP Party.

The eSoca competition ran from May 22nd – August 8th 2008, and a total of 189 songs from 126 artists were entered mostly from Barbados but there were entries from United Kingdom, Trinidad & Tobago and Jamaica. The winners were determined based on the number of songs purchased from GotRhythm.com. This competition is the first of it’s kind and Got Rhythm Inc. will present similar online competitions in other regional territories. The next eSoca competition is scheduled to kickoff in November and will be centered around T&T Carnival 2009. GotRhythm Inc. intends to continue to use technology in innovative ways to promote the music and art of the region by making it easily accessible to local, regional and international customers, in a manner that provides tangible revenue streams to artists and music producers.

Boyce note;Congrats to all the winners of the Got Rhythm from Boyce Voice!

Ayana please remember I was always a fan of yours and Darron Grant as administrator of Boyce Voice we are partners in any money prizes u benefit from..

Congrats to Got Rhythm management in orgainising this innovative competition to spruce up interest in their site and encourage more download sales…

As a collector of movies I have became quite concerned with this new format I now hear about movies now available in Blu Ray. Let me expand.
I started collecting movies from back in the 80’s so I have quite a collection of movies on the old VHS video tape format. All legitimate mind you, there’s no place for pirate copies in my collection. For those of you who don’t know what a VHS tape looks like, look at this….

So on VHS I have titles like Terminator 1 & 2, First Blood, There’s Something About Mary, Bowfinger, Face Off, Blues Brothers and more, like over 30 movies which for Barbados is quite a collection.

Then in the 90’s something came along called DVD Format, so then I had to switch to movies in this new improved format, had to buy a DVD machine then starting with the “Matrix” some of the same movies I had on the old VHS I had to re-purchase on the improved digitized DVDs albeit with extra features.

            My “Matrix DVD

So now I have quite a collection of DVD movies and feeling good, now I hearing bout something called Blu Ray. What the ass is Blu Ray now?  Now do I have to get a new Blu Ray machine and change my movie format again? Cheese on Bread!
I went checking up on this new Blu Ray Crap and here’s what I found….

Blu-ray, also known as Blu-ray Disc (BD), is the name of a next-generation optical disc format jointly developed by the Blu-ray Disc Association (BDA), a group of the world’s leading consumer electronics, personal computer and media manufacturers (including Apple, Dell, Hitachi, HP, JVC, LG, Mitsubishi, Panasonic, Pioneer, Philips, Samsung, Sharp, Sony, TDK and Thomson). The format was developed to enable recording, rewriting and playback of high-definition video (HD), as well as storing large amounts of data. The format offers more than five times the storage capacity of traditional DVDs and can hold up to 25GB on a single-layer disc and 50GB on a dual-layer disc. This extra capacity combined with the use of advanced video and audio codecs will offer consumers an unprecedented HD experience.

I think for the time being I will skip that new HD experience; you could go bankrupt trying to keep up with technology. I think we should all make a stand and stick with the DVD format till we die, it’s cheaper…

You would have seen two newspaper ads that say that Peter Boyce is no longer associated with MADD Entertainment Co Ltd and that is true.                           

That has actually been true from January 2008 but is only now being published. Also you would have seen some contentious articles as it relates to the “Euphoria” name Madd and Corporate Affairs etc; I would refer you to the statement which was released by Santia Bradshaw on behalf of Euphoria Inc to shed more light on that issue.       
The 25 year association between Boyce and Madd has come to an end, there have been good times, there have been badd times and they have been madd times, but those times are now ended. 
From what is stated in the media it would appear that never in the 25 years I was associated with Madd Entertainment there was ever a benefit I brought to the entity and if that is how it is perceived, ok.                 
At points in your life you realize its time to move on and that’s what you do, that’s what I have done….                
Boyce has left the Madd Entertainment building…

Local entertainment company, Euphoria Inc. looks set to stage one of the hottest casts of  Barbadian artistes and bands for Crop Over 2008. At a time when all eyes and ears patiently await the release of music from Barbados’ top entertainers and producers, the organisers of Euphoria will pay tribute to the Barbadian contingent of musical ambassadors who have dominated the soca industry in recent times whilst at the same time providing a platform for several emerging artistes. 

The all star line up which will feature performances from soca diva Alison Hinds, Edwin Yearwoord, Khiomal and Adrian Dutchin of Krosfyah, Lil Rick, Peter Ram, Biggie Irie, Mr. Dale,Blood, Rameses and Jabae 
will join Contone, Pong, Fraud Squad, Stabby the Guard, Versiwile, Unda Dawg and many others at the Wildey Gymnasium on the 3rd August, 2008. DJ’s will include Jon Doe, Dave Smooth, Bubbles and Hurricane.

“The organisers promise that this event will empower all Barbadians to support Bajan brands particularly at a time when the changes in the global economy are likely to impact on the earning capacity of all Barbadians. We need to support each other now more than ever as a demonstration of our collective strength as a people but more importantly we need to create viable platforms to promote, market and exploit the talent of our artistes.Events such as Euphoria are a true demonstration of a Bajan brand which contributes positively to the entertainment sector and to the wider Barbadian economy,” states torganisers.   

Early bird tickets will start at at an affordable price at $30.00.

For more updates and a full line up of the confirmed artistes log on to www.pyramidartists.com for more information

He might be wrong and he usually is, but this week during an interview on CBC radio he was dead right… Well let’s say just “right”.
Blogging about veteran entertainer Smokey Burke and some comments in an interview with Admiral that was literally right on the money.
 Smokey stated that because of the support the United States entertainment industry got from its government, the sector in turn generated billions of dollars and contributed greatly to the U.S economy annually.             
Boyce agrees with this statement one billion percent!
The U.S government supports the industry without getting involved and unfairly competing against the people in it.   In 2007 the movie industry grossed over $9.7 billion in ticket sales, yet you will never hear Condlezza Rice or Vice President Cheney planning to produce  movies and get involved in the entertainment business, they leave that to the persons who specialise and make their living in that sector.   
In Barbados there seems to be perennial mindset by certain misguided officials that Government should be using its awesome power and might to extinguish and crush entrepreneurial cultural spirit. The current Crop Over showdown now on of the mighty government Cohobblopot vs. local entertainers Euphoria event is a blatant example of that perversion of power. 

Looking for a place to take your chile* this Saturday?
(*Chile is Bajan for Child)
Well Pyramid Entertainment has a special kids event on 19th July 2008 which you can read about below….If you notice how well it is written its because I didn’t write it, it’s a press release they sent Boyce Voice….

The spacious grounds of the Plantation Garden Theatre will be transformed into a fantasy playground with activities which include rock climbing, jumping tents, a petting zoo, train rides, face painting, balloon artistes, several games and special guest appearances throughout the evening by various children’s television characters. The evening will climax with a showdown of performances by some of the season’s hottest soca artistes - Lil Rick together with his son the Unda Dawg, Peter Ram, “Soca Queen” Alison Hinds, Mr. Dale, Biggie Irie, Philip 7 of the band Masala, Statement, William Watts, Buggy, the Fraud Squad, twin brothers Barry & Bruce Chandler of the Jabae band, Shanta Prince, Hypasounds, John Mahameed, Stabby the Guard and Nard to name a few.

CEO of Pyramid Entertainment, Santia Bradshaw

noted that, “the event was inspired by the participation of several of the artistes on the Pyramid roster at various children’s parties and children homes during Trinidad carnival to promote their music. During our last visit to Trinidad, Lil Rick, Peter Ram, Mr. Dale and Biggie Irie were so overwhelmed by the reaction of children to their music and the opportunity to meet and take photographs with them that they insisted that we not only host an event of this nature in Barbados but also to donate all profits to a children’s charity.”
Based on the overwhelming public response to this initiative by some of Barbados’ most loved entertainers, this event is likely to become an annual event during the Crop Over season. The demands of the entertainment industry often takes several of the artistes away from their families in order to make a living. Our intention is to create an event which allows the artistes to give back to the community and also to provide an outlet for the artistes to enjoy a fun filled day of activities with their families as well,” Bradshaw added.
Admission to the event is $20.00 per person and entitles all ticket holders (adults and children) to five (5) passes which can be redeemed for access to any of the activities, food and drinks. The event is slated to start at 1 pm and finish at 7pm.
All profits from the event will be donated to the Children’s Variety club,

 

Big Beautiful and Happy

If you think Big is Beautiful more power to you! I read in the media that the organiser of the annual Miss Big and Beautiful Beauty pageant lamenting on the challenges and obstacles which stand in her way.

Lead by people like health professional Dr Henry Frazier, the competition has received some harsh criticism for featuring full size (aka fat) women as encouraging obesity and a lifestyle that leads to heart disease.

One of the innovations that promoter spoke of putting place was the requirement that all the “Big” women in the pageant MUST join a gym.
Now to me that doesn’t make any sense, obviously women following that advice will get smaller which seems to go against concept of being “Big and Beautiful”. If you are going to the gym how will you make that 200 lb minimum weight requirement to enter the competition?

The promoter should not sway from her principles, she needs to “screw her courage to the sticking place”
If you believe that being Big is Beautiful Stand Up for it!
If Asiba and other skinny starve out people don’t like fat girls, that’s their frigging business.
They are men out there who will do any thing for a plus size woman so who the ass are you to say they are not beautiful.
Remember Captain Sawyer 2005 calypso about how he likes them “Big and Fat and Thick”? that is the national anthem for some men.
If I was the promoter I wouldn’t change a damn thing, in fact I would be promoting my contest and my girls will be better and bigger than ever and if you don’t like that well you know what you can kiss, that’s big too!

Admiral MC Nelson

Mac Fingall, Trevor Eastmond and KB Kleen watch out!
I happen to catch a piece of Admiral Nelson MCing “De Big Show” calypso tent this weekend and he was pretty damn excellent.
His joke delivery and comedic timing was impeccable.
Also impressive was his deportment from the time he stepped on the stage with his dazzling white suit he made a statement.
A statement he verbalised when he told the audience they would not miss Mac Fingall because “the Admiral was here”.

As you would know Admiral Nelson is more known for his “Festival Stage” radio show, where his acerbic and critical tongue has been used on many a calypso tent.
He would therefore know that if he were to make a mistake and not be a good mc, he would have had hell to pay. So he had no choice but to come up to the mark.

You would have seen Admiral as an MC for the Banks Cable and Wireless Vintage Cavalcades where he more dispensed historical calypso information with little jokes. But last night he made his intro with a comedic commentary on the different kind of sex people have in their kitchen bathroom and bedroom and established an immediate connection to the audience. It appeared most of the people there had engaged in sex at some time or the other and knew what he was talking about.

Admiral stated it was his objective to host the calypso finals and if his performance in “De Big show” is any thing to go by, that could easily be a reality.