Here’s a picture of DJ Bubbles of Hott 95.3 FM, Madd Kevin and Leon during rehearsals for our 25th November comedy show.

Who cares about them. The focus here is on their t.shirts. They are pretty interesting probably more interesting than the people wearing them. Check them out…

Kevin’s by the way is an original print from when we opened the Rue Rue store in Bridgetown back in 1992. His is a homeboy design pic. of Martin Luther King and Malcolm X hanging out together, which I think is pretty cool even by today’s standards…

Bubbles shirt says, in case you can’t decipher it, “Don’t act stupid, we have world leaders for that”. Me thinks you need to send one of those to Georgie Bush (No relation to President of United States).

If you can’t read Leon’s t.shirt, you need to stop doing that thing that makes you blind..

A Bajan Big Rock*
When you are an entertainer and trying to be a responsible parent, some times you are caught between a rock and a hard place and a song.
What do you do when you as parent, produce music that other parents warn children not to listen to including yours. Let me demonstrate what I mean.

Back in 2004 Madd produced a song written and sung by a young calypsonian named Steely. It was a catchy number that was unique for its time and still is probably up to now. My son Rico happened to hear a rough mix I was listening to before it was released and he was first to fall victim to the song. Immediately after he heard it he went into the bedroom singing the chorus to the song (I told you it was catchy) and came out in tears after being vociferously chastised by his mother for uttering such parental blasphemous lyrics.

Next, he happened to break into the lyrics at school (it was that infectious) and again was severely reprimanded by his teacher for singing such a disgusting and offensive song. Hence I am then put in a position where as a responsible parent I am expected to join in the condemnation of this atrocious song which it so happens Madd produced.

I sat my son down and explained to him that sometimes his mother and teacher are wrong and that if they were to take the time to listen to the song carefully instead of jumping to conclusions, they would realise there’s nothing wrong with it and its all in their minds. However, I said, for the sake of my hide if I were you I would stop singing it…

What atrocious and blasphemous song my son could have hummed that could have brought the ire of authoritive figures?
Click on link below to find out:

 

 Mystery Song [3:31m]: Play Now | Play in Popup

* A Bajan Big Rock; A natural rock formation indigenous to Barbados, You can be hit with one and you get one when your date does not show up…

World AIDS day was December 1st and it got me thinking. We often see those celebrity promos where high profile entertainers promote safe sex and responsible behavior.

I got to thinking about the one world famous character that is suppose to optimize masculine suave and sophistication and is also the worst example of condom use you will ever see.

The world famous secret agent James Bond.

James Bond is so wuckless then. Have you ever counted how many women he beds in a movie. From Halle Berry, Ursula Andress to a character with the provocative name of Pussy Galore. I counted a total of fifty five girls on his website between all the Bond movies.

Pussy Galore, Name of this Character and what Bond gets in Movies

The man has all these fancy gadgets, a pen that shoots bullets, a laser ring, x-ray glasses and yet not a single condom. We regularly see him bedding women of different races and nationalities and yet protection is not in his vocabulary. He has a bullet proof dinner jacket but no “bullet proof” protection for his penis. Bond should have a superfied condom that puts itself on when his thing is ready for use.

Ok Bond,You have a gun, What about protection in your wallet?

While you might say “Boyce… James Bond is a fictional character you idiot. He does not exist!
My point is, all of our public service condom-use ads equal to zero when you have high profile masculine movie examples like Bond who refuses to wrap it up. The day that you are watching a Bond film and he reaches into his wallet and brings out a condom at the appropriate time will be the time to stand up and cheer.

Even Halle Berry gave it up to Bond (I am jealous)

Regularly it is claimed that the sexually suggestive lyrics in calypsoes are leading society astray and contributing to reckless sexual behavior. You want irresponsibility? Look at Bond.

The people from our AIDS committee Dr Jacobs, Sade and Marilyn Sealy, you need to have a conversation with James. If you can’t reach him because he is on a secret mission, you should talk to current Bond producer Barbara Broccoli about conforming his sexual behavior to one which men can safely emulate.

P.S: I also noticed Bond seems to shoot blanks, as all his years of cavorting he has not produced a single offspring…. (Don’t tell Bond where I live)

Question; what do you call a fully grown man who plays with toy monkeys?
Answer; Peter Boyce from Madd!¹

I am in a business where some times you question its legitimacy as an adult occupation: the entertainment business. I have read where major movie actors did the same thing, questioning the fact that as a grown man you made a living pretending to be other people like some kid.

When I was shooting the recent commercials for the Madd comedy show, I felt that way. Here I am a grown man forty something years old dressed like an Indian trying to talk a puppet monkey into buying a ticket for a show. If any one had told me when I was a teen I would still be doing this stuff when I was forty I would have said “never”.
When I was nineteen just out of school I always figured by the time I was thirty which would have been really old, I would be done with the comedian clown thing. It just was not something I would see my self doing as an adult. Now, my next big age milestone will be fifty and I am still at it. When well it end? Can you imagine a 70 year old Ali Singh? It scares the hell out of me.

When I was shooting one of those TV ads with Alison Hinds where I was controlling the puppet monkey I broached the subject with her, she concurred that right now I had my hand up a monkey’s ass as part of my job and that seemed sort of weird. (Let me remind you here we are talking about a puppet monkey).

Yes you recognize where you have developed as a business person being part of major aggressive marketing strategies to attract patrons to shows and generate revenue, but take away the cameras and the lights and you are still really only a grown man talking to a toy. The truth is, while show business is a lot of hard work it is also fun. What other job can you do where you can play with a toy monkey and get paid for it too? This is one great monkey business!

¹ You probably thought the answer was Michael Jackson,but no, He plays with Real monkeys!

Where the hell where you?

Madd put out an announcement inviting people to our 25th anniversary church service at Sons of God Apostolic Church in Christ Church and we had about two people turning up. You are evil, you need the Lord and you need to go to church. Since you did not make it let me share with you some of highlights of our visit to the “Sons of God Apostolic” Baptist Church via the attached pictures.

This church is always interesting to visit, there is always something happening which keeps you awake. Usually that’s what I do when I go to church get comfortable and sleep sitting down (I must be evil too) but at this church something always grabs your attention.

The spectacular view of the pulpit alone is something to behold. The ringing of the bells, the beating of the gong and the welcoming embraces of the congregation. Madd wants to thank Bishop Granville Williams and “Sons of God” church for accommodating us with service for our 25th anniversary.

Madd Entertainment hosted a Media Launch and 25th Anniversary reception at the Blue Horizon Hotel, Rockley Christ Church on Thursday 15th November.It was a great occasion, there was food!
Plans for the “Best of Barbados Gone Madd” comedy show scheduled for the Gymnasium on 25th November were revealed to the sponsors and well wishers who attended. A sample of the humor to be experienced at the show was given by Peter Boyce who gave a speech that was intended to be serious but had the audience in stitches.

The “Bruggadown” character who is performing at the show stood up and made some brief remarks that was bare crap.
A special make up effect transformation occurred where “bruggadown” magically became Carolann Scantlebury who spoke to the fact that she was not the first choice of Madd to be in the group they just could not do any better, and that was true.

Teshia Hinds then got up to speak, spoke, and then sat down. Teshia who is performing at the show spoke of members of Madd being her friends despite the fact Peter has publicly stated on radio she looks cheap and wears marbles as jewelery.

The public was warned to watch out for Madd’s Greatest Hits part two compact disc which is being released to commemorate the 25th Anniversary which was launched at the same event.

“St Clair” the Madd monkey was especially enthralling in his first public appearance in years, and gave some brief antidotes on his time spent working behind the scenes at the NCF.

Madd looks forward to entertaining the public at their 25th anniversary edition of Best of Barbados Gone Madd on 25th November 2007. If you cannot come, send money!

Heres Me, Teshia, Bruggadown aka Carolann and Keith Browne aka P.C Broomes from Madd

Elvis; Very Dead and Very Rich

The thought of dying is seriously crossing my mind as I read the list of the top 13 top dead earning celebrities for 2007 according to Forbes magazine.

When people that have been dead and buried years ago can be making more money than people who are alive and working hard, dying is an option I think we should all consider. According to Forbes these 13 dead Celebes collectively generated US$247 million in the last 12 months.

The mere fact they are being mentioned in Forbes says big money is being made you don’t see them mentioning Bacchanal Time, Krosfyah nor Lil Rick. To make this list a dead person must have generated at least US$7 million in a year, how many of you reading this made 14 million Barbados dollars last year? Or even in your entire lifetime? Maybe you need to die!

Let us go through the list starting from the bottom:

James Dean ($3.5 million).
Bob Marley ($4 million)
James Brown ($5 million)
Steve McQueen ($6 million
Marilyn Monroe ($7 million)
Tupac Shakur ($9 million)
Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss) ($13 million)
Andy Warhol ($15 million),
Albert Einstein ($18 million
George Harrison ($22 million),),
Charles M. Schulz ($35 million),
John Lennon ($44 million)
Elvis Presley ($49 Million)

May I remind you we are talking United States dollars here, not bajan Trinidadian or Guyanese money. Do you notice there are no calypsonians on the list? Maybe I should switch music genres. When a dead man can make $49 million dollars in 12 months I think its time to think about dying, even though my challenge will be how the hell will I spend the damn money after I am dead? Dead men just don’t tell no tales they don’t spend money either, nor can they write blogs.

Now that I think about it, it’s probably better to be alive and poor than to be dead and rich, what do you think? You don’t sound very enthusiastic…

Anyways, for the time being I think I will cancel the dying thing, just make do with the few Barbados dollars I am making and keep writing Boyce Voice!

Have you seen the proliferation of pictures which have inundated the web with our Bajan International superstar Rihanna and her little doggie? The doggie’s name is DJ.
Rihanna does love her little doggie*and takes it every where she goes…

Whether in the supermarket or the spa, Rihanna makes sure her dog is always within reach so she can cuddle and stroke it to her hearts content.

I wonder if it is a Bajan doggie or an American one? Does it bark with an accent or what? Some people feel that Rihanna would now prefer an American doggie but I think regardless that a Bajan doggie would be Rihanna’s first choice.

Here’s a picture of Rihanna kissing her little doggie. Don’t you love a woman who loves to kiss her dog? I know I do! A girl who kisses her doggie can’t be all bad.

At least Rihanna chooses to walk around with a dog and not a cat. Some women like cats, Ellen DeGeneres recently gave up her dog in favor of her cats, we all know why Ellen would do that. But not Robin Fenty, she is a dog lover.

When ever Rihanna calls her dog it comes…
Just the sound of Rihanna calling DJ’s name gets him coming…
Can you blame him? If Rihanna was to call my name I would run and come too…

Why does Rihanna choose to keep company with a small dog instead of those big ugly ones? I am sure a rich girl like her could have had any big dog she wanted. But Rihanna is a smart girl she realises a little doggie goes a long way….!
*Bushism Language

Boyce voice recently celebrated the milestone of achieving our 100,000th page load. A page load happens when ever you click to read a post on this site so it is a good way of measuring readership stats. We are only able to achieve this because of people like you, who keep logging on all the damn time.

Boyce Voice first started in April and continued through Crop Over. As usual, because of the NCF and Government, we had a festival verdant with controversial issues and the lies that we could expose. The challenge was that after Crop Over, what would Boyce Voice be saying?

Well we are proud to say that we have been able to meet that challenge head on…

As you peruse our archives you’ll see that we have dealt with diverse subject matters, from the reviewing of the latest movies, classic movies, Dickey books, racial issues, gay issues, President Bush, girls who cover themselves in chocolate, curse government and your favorite subject, Rihanna. Apart from our Rihanna articles which you read constantly, our most read and commented story has been Admiral Does Not Like Newkey!

Our diverse topics have resulted in the higher page loads than we even had during Crop Over. That’s quite an achievement for a blog that was expected to be only Crop Over oriented. Regardless of the topics we address we have constantly maintained a Bajan perspective in order to remain unique.

Notice I keep saying “we”. Well “we” includes the site administrator and editor – Darron Grant. I like to call his name some times so the government can know about him too and not blame me for everything. Where do we go from here? Well I don’t know about you but when I finish this I am getting some sleep as it is 3 am..

But seriously, Boyce Voice has some big plans in store for you. From November look for a brand new look, an improved site with all sorts of fancy features that Darron is working on. The site will be even more attractive almost as good looking as me.
So brace yourself!…
A new improved Boyce Voice Coming soon to a computer near U!

People are surprised some times when they are in my company in public with the regularity that members of the public call me Mr. Boyce…

I don’t think Edwin is called Mr. Yearwood or Lil Rick is called Mr. Reid as often as I am referred to as Mr. Boyce. When I first started out I was called mostly by the popular character I play “Ali Singh”. Then as time progressed I became known for being involved (some people say instigating but they are liars) in controversial issues. People started calling me Peter Boyce, trouble 3 and like I said before Madd ass Bitch. I was also called “Batman” for a number of years when I was the president of that organization. I liked the Batman name as it made me sound like a super hero.

What resulted in the “Mr. Boyce” being used on a regular basis was what happened in the controversy of 2002. The Madd vs Gymnasium Ltd case over the cost of their VIP section dominated Crop Over ‘02. So much so that the Prime Minister Owen Arthur went on Voice of Barbados’ radio call in show Tell it Like it is to speak to the nation on the issue. When the Prime Minister spoke of me it was not really in glowing terms but throughout the course of his radio submission he referred to me as “Mr. Boyce”.

From the next day it appeared that the general opinion is that if you are important enough that Prime Minster could calls you “Mr. Boyce” well Mr. Boyce it is then. From then on I found that the “Mr. Boyce” title stuck,coupled with the fact that when I am highlighted in the news it is by my last name.

So then “Boyce” became like another one of my alter egos. I much prefer when people call me Peter, Mr. Boyce makes me sound old. The latest name I am now called is Boyce Voice, from people like you who read the blog. The truth of the matter is I am known by so many names that sometimes I don’t know who the heck I am!

*I would like to give you the list of names I hear I am called by government and NCF behind closed doors, but then I would have to rate this article X. I’ll give you one of them though: Since 2004 I was known as “the C—t who F—ked up Crop Over”. Is that funny or what? No wonder they are called clowns.